Recently my dear friend Bryn Johnson shared a wonderful gift with me.  She invited me to observe and share my feedback with a dozen entrepreneurs as they learned to speak to sell from the stage.  I felt myself stretching as I listened to their pitches, reflected on what worked and what didn’t, and considered how to apply lessons learned to my business and my clients.

Here’s a summary of my top six takeaways, with deep thanks to Bryn, David Neagle, Suzanne Evans and all the participants in the More Life Global Tour.

• A nice way to introduce a guest speaker is to give highlights of her background, say “Get on your feet and welcome FirstName LastName!” and start applauding.  This magic combination seems to raise the energy in the room every time, even after lunch.

• One of the worst things a speaker can do is to throw out her preparation at the last minute. When speaking to sell, stick to your story and strategy, even when you are scared.

• As you speak — set up the pain, set up your solution, and make your offer – use stories to paint pictures in the minds of your audience.

• Wear bright/light clothing against a dark background.  Ask the event organizer in advance for the background color behind the stage.

• Assign a timekeeper to signal you from the back of the room.  It’s always better to go under-time than over-time.

• As you craft your signature talk, know the 3-minute version of your story.  Then, in your mind, reframe your offer as a gift to the audience.  Remember, you have experienced your unique set of struggles and life lessons so that your audience can benefit!

Yesterday on a walk with my friend and our kiddos, she saw someone she recognized on the street. “How are you?” my friend asked him.  “I’m joyous!” replied the neighbor.  And he seemed to truly mean it.  What an answer!

Over the past few weeks, I have been feeling joyous too.  This is a wonderful surprise, because a short time ago I felt little more than fear. So for this week’s speed-blog, I thought I’d reflect on why.

• I am living according to the one set of personal standards I articulated in May, rather than constantly judging myself on an ever-moving set of criteria.

• I deepened my commitment to my mission and detached from the money angst that felt so present recently.  I put my money where my heart is and new opportunities magically appeared.

• I am investing more time with the people who matter most to me.  I took my son to his first Red Sox game.  I’ve been marveling longer at my daughter’s monkey-bar tricks.  I spent 2 luxurious hours on the phone with one friend.  And last Thursday, at our school’s annual barbecue, I delighted in feeling comfortable chatting with so many parents and observing my kids interact joyously with their many friends.

• In addition to feeling gratitude, I am allowing myself to feel desire too.  I uncovered and released a nagging shadow belief that desire equals greed.  Aha! – I can be grateful for what I have, and want “more”, with no guilt or shame.

• I am trusting my creative process more.  On Friday I intuitively coached a new client to articulate her mission that matters.  She and I were both open to the flow, and by the end we experienced breakthrough on multiple levels.

• I am being more, doing less.   (If this means I owe you an email, I’m sorry.)

• I have been running regularly.  Last week:  3 miles, 3 times.  My new 43-year record!  It seems that as I run I release fear, doubt and uncertainty.  In their place grows more connection to my voice, brilliance and power!

Where are you this month on your own Joyometer?  Why?

I first heard the Jim Rohn quote “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with” from Ali Brown.  She also shared another version: the size of your bank account is the average of that of the 5 people you spend the most time with.  I found that second one intriguing but it didn’t resonate with me as much as the first.

So lately I’ve been pondering… who are my most treasured role models?  Who are the entrepreneurs to whose level I’d like to elevate my game?  My one rule is these have to be people I feel close to personally, so that I’m sure I understand who they really are, rather than viewing their lives and businesses through only the media’s lens.  (Otherwise, no doubt Oprah would be on my list.)  Here are my five, in alpha order:

• Ken Carter
• Heather Dominick
• Marcie Schorr Hirsch
• Eileen Kern
• Jenny McFadden

My list is aspirational—more about who I’d love to be like and spend lots of time with— than about with whom I actually spend the most time lately.  In fact, the people I spend the most time with are my kids, and while I appreciate that they are providing me with countless growth opportunities (just as I’d hoped for!) they’re not entrepreneurs (yet).

My guess is that everyone on this list would be surprised to see his or her name here, and a couple of them might not even see themselves as entrepreneurs.  To me, they all deserve to be featured.  Here’s what I see that they have in common:

• They are smart and wise

• They are passionate about their work and are constantly learning more about it

• They express unconditional love for themselves and others, even though they are aware they are imperfect

• They practice giving from the saucer, not from the cup (they take good care of themselves; they do not treat themselves as martyrs for a cause)

• They are active seekers and aspirers who have achieved rapid growth in their lives and careers

• They are highly individuated, having chosen to define their success in their own ways, rather than in ways others might

• They are outstanding teachers and mentors

• They have achieved true prosperity: lots of love

Who are your role models?  What do they have in common?  What do their commonalities say about your personal definition of success?